Category #5 Academics
How in the world do you judge this one? We had a smart house. Pre-Med majors, Pre-Dental. Some Finance majors. Guys preparing for Law School. I guess one way to look at it is simply compare which floor had more couldn’t-get-into-BYU-had-to-go-to-UVCC. But that is about even, too. Cam tips the scale a little in the Upstairs favor by keeping half of BYU collegiate athletes academically eligible, yet actually there is a definitive way to decide this that nobody can argue with. Clearly the edge goes to Downstairs. Why? Because their team always won Sunday night Trivial Pursuit. Always. Whatever team Ted and Luke were on won. And they didn’t just win, it was a landslide. We’re talking wedges galore. Plus, Joe is pretty dumb. Winner Downstairs.
Category #6 Intramurals
While the Hotel never took home the coveted Intramural t-shirt in any sport, we got to a couple semis and finals. Downstairs had many shots at the outdoor and indoor soccer titles led by Rico’s goal scoring, Jonny in goal and B. Webb’s defense. Upstairs had a great shot at the volleyball tee with Cam, Pup, Dirty B and the Hillman boys – however we all know they sandbagged the tournament. Downstairs even had a couple shots at obscure intramural titles, namely Ultimate Frisbee with Rigby, Ted, Josh and rest of the Frisky Wookies – and Co-ed Intertube Water Polo. However, we all know we were only playing that because Ginger Cooley was, too. But the edge goes to Upstairs for their valiant effort in Provo City League ball, where for one season the “Nads” had the Brick house and Blue Light Special girls cheering, “Go Nads”. That, in and of itself, is worth the win. Winner Upstairs.
Category #7 Cleanliness
With the exception of Shane’s room, Upstairs was pretty clean. Downstairs wasn’t so bad either. In fact it was spotless after one of Dave’s crazy cleaning sprees. Both Upstairs and Downstairs, at one point or another, had those un-enterable rooms. Upstairs was Moulton’s and Downstairs was the Pitzak/Lambourne duo. Pitzak’s was sort of a Pig Pen meets Maxim magazine and Moulton’s was a cross between Trent Reznor and Jarret’s Room with a splash of Richard Simmons. But the cleanliness edge goes to Upstairs for their cooking and cleaning deal with Look-at-me-Lauren and Nicole. How does this sound for a bargain: We’ll pay you $10 a night to cook dinner and clean the house? Oh and the $10 also has to pay for our dinner groceries. Throw in a hunk like Mateo and a maddog like the Pup and I’ll take it. Winner Upstairs.
Category #8 Chicas
Who kissed the most girls? Upstairs or Downstairs. Well one person heavily tips the scales. Sean Brown. Case closed. Even with Joe and Hans combined – nobody even came close to the sheer volume of Mr. Brown. And the drama that came with it all was AWESOME. Thanks for the memories Sean. Winner Downstairs.
So mid-way through the score is tied 4-4. More to come tomorrow.