This is a little long so bare with me. I take the blame for number five. Because of me, you all have 3 fewer friends. Sorry ‘bout that. But look at the bright side, that’s fewer Christmas cards. Save some money on stamps. A few birthdays you can forget. On the other hand, you’ll need to delete phone numbers from your cell phone and that’s a little work. You’ll have to scratch them out of your address book - that's effort. And heaven forbid you cross paths with them. That'd be awkward. I suggest you just look down and keep walking. Number 5 on the 2005 Hotel California Top Ten list is my email debacle with Mike and Stephanie Whiting. Before I explain, I have to back up a little. You see in March, 2005 I got an email from our old friend Debbie Lewis. It said:
on 3/18/05 1:35 PM, Debbie Lewis at firstname.lastname@example.org wrote:
Hello Friends and Family!
We've finally made the big move to our new house. We
are loving all the space compared to our last two
years of apartment life!
Our new address is:
10307 North Tamarack Way
Cedar Hills, UT 84062
We've got plenty of extra space for those of you that
don't live in town. If you ever need a place to stay
our door is open. For those of you that live close
by, stop by for a visit when your in the area- we'd
love to see you!
Hope you all are doing well-
And she attached the first picture at the top right. As you can see, she accidentally attached the wrong picture. So, I decided to have a little fun and responded to all of her friends:
On 3/18/05 at 11:58 pm Jamie Webb at email@example.com wrote:
Congrats on your new house. It's beautiful. I really like what you've done with it. The landscaping is perfect. And the unfinished wood is totally complimented by the mountain backdrop. I would have never picked you for a black window kind of girl, but I think it definitely makes a statement -- and, hey, when decorating your house for Halloween you are already half-way there. I'm sure Kodiak (which is her little boy) will love growing up in such a house and I'm sure he'll turn into a totally normal boy. He definitely won’t have any nightmares. Yours is going to be THE house on the block where all his friends will want to play.
Unfortunately, I won't be coming to Utah anytime soon. And, I'm so sorry to say, that I have already committed to staying at others' houses for the next 15 years. But thanks for the invitation to stay at such a warm and welcoming home. I'm sure all your other friends can't wait to stop by and see the inside. And don't be surprised Deb, when they all spend the night slumbering away in peace. And, of course, return again and again.
Again, beautiful home Deb. Enjoy.
So, you see, a little fun. I got a few comments from Deb’s friends that said it was funny and stuff. Well, then a few months later, I received this email from Mike and Stephanie Whiting also informing friends that they’d moved. And they attached the second picture from the top on the right. A cute, creative picture - as if they had packed their boys in a box. Funny.
on 5/11/05 5:01 PM, the WHITINGS at firstname.lastname@example.org wrote:
1716 Elfin Forest RD. #112
San Marcos , CA 92078
760 798 0817 home
760 917 5404 m (steph)
760 917 6031 m (mike)
Well, on the heels of my successful humor with Debbie’s picture, I had an idea. So, I doctored up their picture and resent it. It is the third picture from the top on the right. And I wrote:
On 5/12/05 2:11 PM, Jamie Webb
Congratulations. San Marcos is great.
But, what does it say on the box above the home depot box? Does that read...? Wo! Too much information! That's the kind of thing you may think about labeling differently if you move again. Well, at least we know you guys have a healthy sex life -- that's a big box.
Well, later that day, I got an email from Tracy Green who basically said that it was stupid and the "sex toys" thing was inappropriate and mean, and I shouldn’t have done that, etc. etc. Then I got the following email from Stephanie:
on 5/12/05 6:13 PM, the WHITINGS at email@example.com wrote:
Hey Jamie! Ha Ha. Pretty funny. One problem. This e-mail of yours went to grandparents, aunts, uncles, parents, Mike's business associates etc. Please send out an apologie e-mail to everyone. Thanks. Steph
Then, I got an email from Mike. And, as you can see, his remarks were very to the point.
On 5/12/05 6:14 PM, the WHITINGS at firstname.lastname@example.org wrote:
I expect to here from you today (760) 917-6031 –Mike
So I called him and he was pretty bitter. Not happy at all. Apparently he didn’t think the grandparents and business associates would find it funny, but would find it in poor taste. He kept asking me, ‘what were you thinking’? I love that question. 'What were you thinking?'. And the conversation was left with him just being upset and me saying it was probably an impulsive mistake. Well, later that night I got an email from Stephanie and Tracy’s parents that simply read:
on 5/12/05 8:20 PM, email@example.com at firstname.lastname@example.org wrote:
THE HUMOR IS QUESTIONABLE--
MIKE AND LYN
Questionable? Me? Please. When have I ever done anything that was questionable? This is was MAYBE the first time ever -- MAYBE. These people don’t know me at all.