Friday, January 09, 2009

2008 Hotel California #5

#5. The number 5 event of the year is the Huge Take of the Year. And this year it comes from the one we caught driving dirty, Mr. Dirty B. In Janurary of this past year shortly after the 2007 Top Ten got under way, we received this email from Scott.

Subject: RE: Honorable mention associate
Date: Fri, 18 Jan 2008 16:33:12 -0700

Hey What's Up?I hope that everyone is doing well. It is fun to see all of the names on the list some I know and some I don't. There are some great memories here.

Here are a few honorable mentions that I will pass along:

* Hans and I were laughing yesterday about I think it was when Conrad moved into the Hotel California and Hans hopped into the shower the very first day Conrad was in the house or I should say forced into the shower by Conrad. Amy I don't know if your husband should be that excited about the man crush because Conrad used to star in "Big Love" before HBO had the show if you know what I mean.

* Speaking of future members of the Hotel California Hans, Carlos and myself have new boys this last year that are only 7 months apart. Hans and Carlos boys are already bench pressing their cribs. They are big boys.

* I was in Bulgaria on some business this last year and was watching TV one night (great selection of TV) and they were broadcasting the USA Volleyball team against Yugoslavia. Before my eyes was Rich Lambourne. Most of you probably knew that, but he is doing very well right now for Team USA.

* The funniest one of the year has got to be Scott Hillman. I don't know if you know this or not, but Hillman will openly talk how he has the smallest package in the world. One day there were about five different couples over at my house and Hans said we are going to find out. So Hans takes him to the ground and puts him in some kind of submission hold and we all find out that he is not a liar. Good thing that doesn't affect having children, because Hillman could get a rock pregnant. I won't give away any secrets, but you need to ask Hillman how long it takes for him and wife to be intimate after they have a baby. You will die laughing.

* Hans is on the radio right now and he is pretty funny. They have the highest ratings of any sports morning show. He does some pretty funny bets and he has only lost one where he needs to run through the Gateway Mall through their fountain in a speedo. The ones that other people have lost to him are getting a nipple pierced, shave your eye brows and getting Maced.

If any of you are coming to Utah shoot me an email and we will go out and have some fun. Hans, Carlos and I go boating at least twice a week in the summer and you haven't seen anything until you see Hans do a back flip wakeboarding. That is a lot of weight.

Where do I even start? I can’t outdo any of this. It’s just perfect. Hillboy’s small weiner. Hans making people get maced. All the big baby boys having a play date. Great stuff. So, Hillboy, how long does it take for you and your wife to be intimate after you have a baby? Congrats B-Dirt for the huge take of the year and this year’s #5 spot.

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